I like to believe that everyone I talk to regularly is a good person. In my eyes that’s a person who loves others and consistently tries to grow as a human being – not someone who’s perfect, but someone who tries to act in the interest of others as well as themselves. Sometimes doing the right thing isn’t popular, though. Humans are very social creatures. We like being popular – many of us (myself included) try to create popular content not just because the more views we get the more successful we can become, but because it’s validating.
One of the ways that I deal with hard things is by writing stories. This week on the blog, I will be sharing one of these short stories - a sort of fictionalized version of my intensive outpatient therapy last year.
This is a guest post. If you are interested in contributing a guest post of your own, please visit the contact page and send me your idea! All posts must be mental health related. This post will discuss abusive relationships, PTSD, and trauma. While these topics are not discussed in detail, reader discretion for those… Continue reading I Just Want to Feel Normal (But My Brain Won’t Let Me)
Roughly one year ago at age 25 I was sitting in my room nervously holding a bottle of Adderall, terrified to put one of the small pills into my mouth and test its effects. My years with my previous psychiatrist had taught me to fear any new medication and its possible effects and to tread… Continue reading Here’s What I Learned in my First Year Being Diagnosed with Adult ADHD
Hello, thank you for returning this blog. If you want to help me write more consider supporting me on Patreon or buying me a coffee. You should also check out the book I was recently a part of, "Making Sense of Psychiatric Diagnosis", available on both kindle and in paperback now. Here is my Twitter,… Continue reading Dissociation VS Inattenion – Overlap and Differences
Ever since I was a child, I’ve been fascinated with Halloween - or, more precisely, the fear of the unknown. The idea that something could snare me up in the middle of the night right from the safety of my bed was one that kept me awake on more than one occasion. It was this idea that something was around just the right corner and that, if you were careful to look for it, you’d find something no one else had found before, almost as if a new world were hidden in plain sight - and the world you found wasn’t guaranteed to be friendly...there were a series of books from the library that students would dare each other to read because it was considered so scary. We would pour over the pages, checking them out one after the other, eager to be put on the waiting list at the middle school library to check out the books next. Those books were Alvin Schwartz’s anthology masterpiece, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, illustrated by Stephen Gammell.
Sometimes life gives you lemons and sometimes life gives you pineapples. I got Autism - and whatever fruit you choose to equate that too. I also acquired a love for the written word.
A list of LGBTQA+ folks who also advocate for mental health. Hopefully part 1 of a series!
This week's post is by a guest blogger, Ashley L. Peterson. Typically a guest post would be uploaded the last week of the month, but with moving, a new job, new medication, and other responsibilities piling up and toppling on top of me, I haven't been able to get around to it. I just haven't… Continue reading When Body Meets Brain
Dissociation is also a good way of explaining “fight, flight, or freeze” with dissociation being the act of freezing. The brain feels that it cannot escape, and so attempts to leave the situation mentally. This is why people experiencing high levels of stress or perhaps traumatic events may not fight back - the brain is preventing them from doing so in an attempt to keep the harm to as much of a minimum as possible. It is an involuntary reaction and not the fault of the person experiencing it.
That year is, in a way, in pieces for me. Some pieces are clear with sharp, jagged edges that cut me like glass even now. Others are like fog I can put my fingers through without grasping, without feeling the edges, without knowing what to feel or what I felt then. Mental illness can really fuck with your memory of things, more than your brain can on its own. It’s terrifying to think that my version of events is, at best, my version - that everyone else’s was different, that everyone saw me in a different way, and that every time I remember this I am only remembering the last time I remembered it.
This past Saturday, I found that winter had made its home outside my window. I opened my dark blue curtains and squealed with delight to see big, fluffy snowflakes falling steadily down outside. After I had eaten I found myself rushing to put on a coat and hat, cutting the ends of the fingertips off… Continue reading A walk in the snow
I’d like to have a personal space to vent my feelings? But this became a space for something else. How do I get it back?
I’m not sure how to update my personal life on here lately. So I just... haven’t been doing that. But I want that to change. I want to have a spot for my personal thoughts again. It feels quite frightening. Will you stop liking me the more you know me? But I also miss writing… Continue reading I’ve been absent.
There's a lot of wonderful art that includes black cats, and recently I discovered one more whose work is wonderfully expressive. When I learned that these are in fact her cats I knew I had to talk about it
I'm stuck again. Right now I'm in the break room at work, calming down after a particularly shitty day. I'm trying to breathe and get myself to just write, just do it, just work when I get home - and I can't. It feels almost like being awake through sleep paralysis, or like when a… Continue reading Stuck – The Problem of Unmanaged and Untreated ADHD
Hey guys! This week's post is actually on Medium, not WordPress. Follow this link to find it and give it a read! Thank you for stopping by! I promise I won't stop posting here, but I think that this might be a better outlet for more personal thoughts, while Medium would probably be better for… Continue reading The Difference Between Meth and Adderall is What Makes Adderall, Well, Adderall, Not Meth – now on Medium